6 ways for assertive team communication

As a trust-based company handling multiple projects and requests, being open and transparent is essential for keeping everything on track. Assertive communication isn’t just about learning to say no – it’s about being clear and honest, while making sure everyone feels respected.

In one of our recent meetings, we explored several everyday situations where being assertive can make a huge difference. These ideas are not just for designers – they’re useful for any team, no matter the field.

1 – Managing tight timelines

You’ve got a full plate, and suddenly, a last-minute request drops in your inbox with an urgent deadline. What do you do?

Passive:

• “I’ll try to get it done, but I’m not sure I can meet the deadline.” → Leaves things unclear and doesn’t set real expectations.

Aggressive:

• “There’s no way I’m doing this! You should have asked earlier.” → Shuts down any discussion and raises tension.

Assertive:

• “I’d love to help, but I’m juggling other deadlines right now. Could we push this back to next week?”

• “I’ll do my best, but to meet this deadline, I’ll need to focus on this and push back some other tasks. Does that work for you?”

2 – Balancing workload across projects

Multiple projects need your attention, and they all seem to be high priority. How do you manage it?

Passive:

• “Sure, I’ll handle it all.” → Leads to stress and rushed work. 

Aggressive:

• “I’m already drowning in work, and now you’re adding more? This is ridiculous!” → Stops the conversation.

Assertive:

• “I’m currently working on X and Y. If this takes priority, can we move something else to later?”

• “This sounds urgent, but I’m at capacity. Could we get everyone together to realign priorities across projects?”

• “I can handle this, but I’ll need some support. Can anyone else pitch in to help get this done on time?”

3 – Clarifying ambiguous requests

You receive a request that’s vague or missing key details. How do you respond?

Passive:

• “Okay, I’ll try to figure it out.” → Leads to confusion and wasted time.

Aggressive:

• “This request makes no sense! How am I supposed to do this without proper information?” → Makes the other person feel attacked.

Assertive:

• “Could you provide a draft or written details of what you’re envisioning?”

• “I have a few questions to clarify the request. Can we set up a quick call to go over specifics?”

• “Given that we’re working across different cultures and languages, I want to make sure I fully understand your needs – could you explain a bit more?”

4 – Addressing disagreements in design

You and a colleague disagree on a design decision. How do you handle it?

Passive:

• “It’s fine, we’ll do it your way.” → Avoids conflict but leaves issues unresolved.

Aggressive:

• “Your idea won’t work, it’s not practical at all!” → Shuts down collaboration and makes others defensive.

Assertive:

• “I see your point, but I’m concerned about how this might affect user flow. Can we test a couple of variations?”

• “I think both ideas have merit. Let’s weigh them against the project goals and see what fits best.”

• “I hear you, but I think we’re looking at it from different angles. Let me explain my reasoning a bit more – it might help you understand why I made these decisions.”

5 – Navigating skill gaps

You’re asked to handle something you’re not familiar with. How do you communicate that?

Passive:

• “I’ll give it a try, but no promises.” → Leaves room for doubt and underperformance.

Aggressive:

• “I don’t know how to do that—it’s not my job!” → Shuts down the opportunity to learn or collaborate.

Assertive:

• “I haven’t done this before, but I’m excited to learn. Could I get some pointers or resources to help me out?”

• “This is new territory for me, so I’ll need some extra time to figure it out. Is the timeline flexible?”

• “I’m happy to take this on, but I might need some guidance. Could we check in periodically to make sure I’m on the right track?”

6 – Managing requests outside your responsibility

You’re asked to take on a task that doesn’t quite fit within your role. How do you respond?

Passive:

• “Okay, I’ll do it, even though it’s not my responsibility.” → Leads to frustration and burnout.

Aggressive:

• “That’s not my job! Find someone else.” → Can feel uncooperative and dismissive.

Assertive:

• “I’m happy to help, but this seems outside my usual scope. Who else could be a better fit for this?”

• “I can take this on, but let’s clarify the impact it’ll have on my current responsibilities. Can we realign tasks if necessary?”

When it’s justified to be more passive or aggressive

While assertiveness is usually the ideal communication style, there are situations where being passive or aggressive can be temporarily justified. 

Being more passive can be appropriate when you’re gathering information or when diplomacy is needed. If you're new to a project or unsure of the full scope, a reserved approach gives you time to assess the situation.

On the other hand, being more aggressive might be justified when a situation is urgent or critical, and compromise isn’t an option. You may need to stand your ground if a decision risks harming the project or when safety, ethics, or legal considerations are at stake.

The key is knowing when these styles are appropriate. If you tend to lean towards being passive or aggressive, aim to return to balance as soon as the situation allows.

What if there’s no agreement?

When assertive communication isn’t enough to reach an agreement, it’s important to involve a neutral third party. This could be your team lead or an HR & Culture Manager who can mediate and offer a fresh perspective.

In these situations, it’s crucial to avoid the worst communication style: passive-aggressive.  It combines passive avoidance with aggressive hostility, leading to confusion and resentment. Not communicating at all can also be aggressive. Refusing to engage is a way of exerting control, and it can escalate tension just as much as confrontation.

Conclusion: Assertive communication helps everyone

Assertive communication isn’t about being difficult or shutting people down – it’s about being clear, respectful, and proactive. In a fast-paced environment like ours, it’s crucial to communicate in a way that sets expectations while fostering collaboration.

Here’s something important to remember: We all have natural tendencies to be either more passive or aggressive in certain situations. It’s part of our human nature. But assertiveness isn’t a personality trait; it’s a skill that can be developed. 

This also extends to how we respond to others. Sometimes, especially when working with more junior team members, their communication may be more passive or aggressive. It’s important to offer constructive feedback in those moments, showing them how transparent communication works and helping them find more balanced, assertive responses.